Shake Shack: New York Gets it Wrong. Again

I'm not sure why I should be surprised that New York City once again got something wrong. This is after all the city that had one of the largest Loyalist populations in the Revolutionary War (how'd that work out for ya?), gave us the financial crisis of 2008-2009, and more recently Anthony Weiner's, well, weiner (h/t JAG). So it should come as no surprise that Shake Shack is one more manifestation of how wrong New York City can be on issues of importance. Full disclosure before I get into my critique of Shake Shack: First, I love hamburgers, they are possibly the greatest food ever created. Second, I actually really like New York City, well Manhattan at least (too many unwashed Hipsters in the rest of the city).

So with that said, I was understandably excited when I heard that Shake Shack was opening in Washington. I had heard great things from my New York friends, who raved about it constantly. It was supposed to be the best thing at Citi Field (certainly better than the Mets' play). Last night I had a happy hour for a former work colleague at Public Bar and I decided that it being located directly next door, this would be a good opportunity to try it out. I proposed it to two of my room mates, both of whom readily agreed.

Here's my critique about Shake Shack: it's simply not that good. It's mediocre at best. The burger was OK -- the patties were thin (which I like) and seasoned well, but the sauce was nothing special. The milkshake was good, but it cost $5 and was tiny. For a dollar more, I could've had one twice the size from Thomas Sweets in Georgetown (not exactly known for its cheap ice cream). The fries were basically Ore Ida crinkle cut fries, you know the ones that your Mom used to make for you when she and your Dad were going out in the evening and she felt guilty for not cooking a real meal (OK -- maybe it's because you made her feel guilty, or I did at least...). Overall I'd give it a 5 out of 10.

But Shake Shack gets at something deeper. In a nutshell, Shake Shack is what's wrong with New York City. It's a mediocre establishment at best, but because it's from New York and because New Yorkers rave about it, we're all supposed to just accept it as the second coming. OH MY GOD! New York is SO amazing! It's the same attitude that Yankees' fans have: why would the other teams even compete against us? We're champions. We've won 27 World Series! Never mind that the Yankees were an awful team from 1981-1994 (conveniently the rebuilding started when Steinbrenner was banned from baseball). Never mind that they've been up and down since 2000 (Hey remember the greatest choke in SPORTS history in 2004? Oh you don't? I do.). Never mind that in recent years the Yankees are pretty much the only winning NYC team (Disclaimer: I am not bashing the Mets here, I actually like the Mets.).

But it's that New York smugness, that New York arrogance that allows them to get away with raving about a mediocre hamburger place or a mediocre team. Sorry, but not everything from New York is the GREATEST thing in the world. OH MY GOD! I LOVE living in Brooklyn, it's SO edgy! It's SO hip. I just feel like it's SO real. No, it's not. It's filled with a bunch of unwashed hipsters, who are most likely living off of a trust fund. At this point the only people who live in Brooklyn are the hipsters. Those "real" people that they wanted to be near have long since packed up and moved on. They can't afford the rent. But because it's in New York City, it must be the best!

My anger would be far more muted if New York could simply accept that they're a city like most others. Yes it's big, yes it falls into the category of "metropolis," but like any city it has it's good things and bad things. Not everything from New York is the GREATEST. Frankly though I think this is too much to ask. So next time I see a 9-year old boy wearing a "Got Rings?" t-shirt on the T in Boston, I'm going to throw my Shake Shack burger at him. I think he'll get the point then.